Whose Life Are Your Living?
Are you living your own life, or someone else’s?
Strange question, but think about it for a moment. What messages were you given as a youngster by your family, friends and teachers? Who were you supposed to be? Yes you may have come from that ‘one in a thousand’ family who said you could be anything as long as you were happy. But I doubt it. (You can test this by imagining how they would have reacted if you’d said you wanted to be a happy rent boy or a happy stripper!) For the rest of us, we were programmed from an early age to become something we’re not. Often the programming was blatant: “All Bradley men are motor mechanics…” (So you’ll be one too.) Or: “We come from a long line of great cooks…” (Time to get the recipe book out then!) Maybe the programming was more subtle: “Sarah’s husband is such a great family man.” Or: “Joan’s daughter is so musical and talented.”
Bottom line is –you got the message. Usually it was drip-fed into your soul over many years – often in a well-meaning way, of course, by people who had ‘your best interests’ at heart. So you ended up where you are right now.
Take a long hard look at your life. Is it where you want to be? Are you living your dream? Probably not.
I’ve had hundreds of one-to-one consultancy sessions with my students over the years and one thing has always struck me – people simply aren’t doing what they WANT to do but what they’re SUPPOSED to do.
They are living lives of quite misery, largely unfulfilled and wasting their genuine natural talents. Isn’t that tragic?
How about you? Which sort of life are you living? Maybe you can make a start at finding out what went wrong by trying to tease-out your own early programming.
Who and what were you ‘supposed’ to be?
You may discover, with horror, that you’ve been living someone else’s life instead of your own!